2007-10-15 - 10:34 a.m.
In Tucson. Found a swimming pool, found a girl sitting by said swimming pool with her feet in the water. She says she's here for a dance competition. Says she leaves tomorrow. Never says her name.Two hours later, once she's straddling me on a pool chair, I say, out loud, "I can't do this." She says, "Do what?" and grinds a little bit.
That is what I can't do, anymore. I've had problems with it before, where I decided not to do anything, but I never before was able to qualify exactly what was so wrong about it.
Now I know; Me being a romantic extends beyond the desire for dramatic chases and tensions.. it's the disdain for everything but. It's the same reason I always decline when somebody asks me if I want some money. It happens a lot, despite my being well off, and even back when I was broke I would always say no. I don't like things handed to me. I don't like girls who fall into my lap, wrap their arms around me, and whisper into my ear, "My room is empty."